Coaching conversations rarely stick to “just work.” Because work isn’t just work; it’s the loudest echo chamber for whatever you’re living through.
This weekend, I met a client at a local park. A rare “in-person” session; coffee cups balanced on a bench, geese honking like backup singers. It wasn’t the serene session I’d imagined, but honestly, it fit. Because we were talking about messy transitions. This client is navigating two: a career pivot and a separation from a long-term partner, while working remotely.
***
ME (sipping coffee, mentally apologizing to my adrenal glands): What’s been hardest for you since we last spoke, the new job is in full swing, right?
CLIENT (watching a goose chase a toddler): Honestly? Half the stuff at work feels like my breakup all over again.
ME (raising eyebrows, inner voice: And here I thought the goose was today’s drama): That’s… not on the job description. Tell me more.
CLIENT (half-laugh): Unclear expectations. I don’t know what people want from me. I ask, but I get vague answers.
ME: So… déjà vu?
CLIENT (groans): Yeah. Like the last two years of my relationship.
ME (thinks: Do I start charging therapy rates?): Okay, what else?
CLIENT (gestures with coffee, barely avoiding disaster): Disjointed communication. Slack messages with no context, meetings that go sideways. Then I spiral and loop, wondering if I misunderstood everything.
ME (scribbling, wondering how much of this will be legible later): And outside of work?
CLIENT (shrugs): Friends check in, but it’s awkward. I say ‘I’m fine’ when I’m not.
ME: That’s tough. You’re single for the first time in a long time. It’s not just work you’re relearning—it’s life.
CLIENT (quiet for a beat): Exactly. Even the loneliness feels the same. I log off and… silence. Just me and the fridge humming.
ME: Remote work doesn’t help, does it?
CLIENT (eyes bright): That screen starts to feel like the only window to the world. And right now the window’s cracked, but not open. I can see out, but I can’t get through.
We sat there, letting it settle.
ME: So, what could help pry the window open a little?
CLIENT (decisive): I need to move my body. Join a rec league, or something where I can meet people and burn off all this angst. Get my head out of my a$$ and my house!
***
Workplace triggers often mirror personal ones. Unclear expectations, misread intent, disconnection; these things don’t stop at the office door. Especially when the “office” is next to your kitchen table.
And after my own week of late nights, hard conversations, and too much fridge humming, I owned his insight applied to me. So, after our session, I took out my bike and temporarily burned off my own angst, because sometimes the client is the coach, and ACTIVITIES help us all recalibrate [should I credit his session?]
So, let me ask you: What’s a workplace trigger you’ve faced that echoed your personal life, and how did you overcome it?
