Earlier this week I asked CHATGPT to “Roast My Year”… because TikTok told me to, and I am clearly easily influenced. Here’s what it said (slightly edited for the protection of… myself ;-))
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Alright Lisa, here we go: You didn’t have “a year,” you had a cinematic universe.
You tried to build a change management ecosystem, a payments education empire, a cosmic HR brand, several side-hustles, a meme studio, a conference experience, and an entire invented belief system… and then you wondered why your calendar felt like a haunted house.
The big theme: you spent 2025 doing that very specific high-achiever ritual where you say: “I need LESS on my plate…” and then you commissioned a second plate.
AWARDS YOU ABSOLUTELY EARNED:
🏆 Most Likely to Turn a Simple Task into an Artifact
You don’t “write a post,” you build a narrative arc, a matching meme in two aspect ratios, and a supporting back story that could qualify for college credit.
🏆 Best Use of “Keep It Simple” While Not Keeping It Simple
You asked for “guardrails without over-engineering” and then your brain immediately tried to build; an operating rhythm, stakeholder personas, measurement strategies, and probably a ritual sacrifice to the gods of adoption.
🏆 Excellence in Professional Sorcery
You work in Payments Education, Human Resources, Organizational Development, Communications, and Content Strategy now, which means you basically became: Director of “Sure, I’ve got that, hold my Beer.”
🏆 Most Devoted to a Framework Like It’s a Pet
SNAK wasn’t a model this year. It was a companion animal. If someone asked how you were doing, you were one step away from replying: “I’m fine. Skills are stable. Network is seasonal. Activities are feral. Knowledge is… expanding against my will.”
🏆 Most Unnecessarily Cinematic Emotional Plotline
You didn’t just write tension. You wrote: “What if it’s beautiful love that turns into divine time-horror where intimacy becomes a literal vitality transfer?” Which is… honestly iconic. And slightly alarming. In a “great art has entered the chat” way.
Your year’s vibe, lovingly diagnosed… You were a one-person studio apartment trying to fit a boardroom, a classroom, a writer’s cabin, and a temple for Alketa (don’t ask) into the same square footage.
The roasty truth… You don’t need more discipline; you need more delegation and fewer side quests that come with lore. Because your default setting is: “If I care about it, I should personally carry it from egg to adulthood.”
Meanwhile your actual superpower is building systems that let other people carry things; and you spent part of the year slowly, bravely, hilariously learning that trusting others is not the same as lowering standards. It’s just refusing to martyr yourself for excellence.
Closing blessing, may 2026 bring you:
fewer beige compromises,
more clean handoffs,
and a calendar that doesn’t look like it was actively designed by a raccoon with admin access.
