Friday rant. There are rules of engagement. And then there’s LinkedIn.
Where some people are here to connect, but others pitch you a fractional CFO service 14 seconds after hitting “Accept.”
Let’s just begin where the madness lives: the random taggers!
If you’re tagging me in a comment thread about blockchain governance or agile workflow hacks and we’ve never so much as exchanged a polite emoji, you’re not networking. You’re stalking.
And in my corner of the internet, that’s an instant block, no appeal. Straight to digital jail, do not pass Go, do not collect your “Top Voice” badge.
Now don’t get me wrong—I genuinely love this platform. I’ve found work here (Erin Pavane). I’ve made friends here (Kayleen Holt). I’ve even been inspired here (Melissa Milloway, Tim Slade).
But LinkedIn has always been that weird cousin of the internet. Buttoned-up on the outside, deeply chaotic underneath. Like if Excel wore a leather jacket and whispered, “You up?” at 1:12 AM. Here’s just a taste:
People who comment enthusiastically but never “Like,” are theye trying to conserve emotional calories?
Serial breadcrumbers who drop a “So true!” once every equinox.
Analytics that say “your post reached 1,800 professionals!” but fail to mention 1,792 of them bounced faster than a 1st-round interview with no salary range listed.
The DM flirts. Sir. I posted about labor laws. Calm down.
I joined this space because a co-worker (Frank Adelman) suggested it way back when it was shiny and new.
And that one nudge turned into clients, colleagues, conference invites, and actual friends I’ve even met IRL (Parker A. Grant, PhD) and would absolutely trust with my houseplants or resume.
And it didn’t happen because I showed up once every 14 months to announce, “Big career pivot! Ask me!”
It happened because I stuck around.
Even when the bots got weird.
Even when the hashtags tried too hard.
Even when my DMs felt like I had stumbled into Hinge.
So, here’s the tough love:
If you’re only logging in when you job hunt, your boss unravels, or your coach says “network more,” you’re already late.
LinkedIn is not a crisis tool.
It’s a community that runs on energy, effort, and an occasional eye roll.
So if you want it to work for you, work with it:
React to people’s posts.
Leave real comments that don’t read like AI-generated fortune cookie wisdom.
Share what you’re learning, not just what you’re launching.
And for the love of all things HR, stop sliding into people’s DMs for anything other than a professional opportunities.
Because despite the fakes, the flakes, and the analytics that whisper sweet nothings, real people are here. And some of them? Might just be your next boss. Or cofounder. Or honest-to-goodness friend.
So go ahead. Comment. Connect.
Or just lurk in the shadows clicking “Insightful” like a stoic emoji ninja.
Either way, I see you.
And I’m still URfriendinHR… but don’t tag me unless it’s relevant.
Seriously. I will block you mid-scroll.
